You might be embarrassed to do what you REALLY wanted in Life!

For a long time I yearned to improve myself; my true inner self, but something was holding me back. I made a lot of excuses back then; I didn’t have time; I was too tired; I wasn’t sure what direction my search should take.

However, the truth was I felt embarrassed about opening myself up, especially to those close to me. All that changed when I went for a stroll along a beach.

I went for a short camping holiday. I stayed on a small island. It was beautiful, very peaceful; just what I was looking for. On about the third or fourth morning I went for a stroll along the beach. The beach stretched the entire length of the island, about 20km and it was about 2km wide!

After about an hour or so, I came across a young woman who was doing some type of oriental martial art. She was all by herself and seemed totally absorbed in what she was doing.

Maybe this is not so strange, but what really seemed incongruous (and darn right silly to me) was that she was wielding a Samurai sword. I really did find myself thinking how silly she looked and actually became a little annoyed.

My first thought was: “What a poser”. Did she really love herself so much she thought other people would want to see her performance with a sword? I found myself wishing she would lose her footing and fall down, and then I could say: “that’s what happens when you think so highly of yourself”. But she didn’t fall over; she kept moving, slowly and gracefully.

I continued walking along the beach. I tried to enjoy the remainder of my stroll but I kept thinking about the young woman and her sword! “Why are some people such exhibitionists?”

I kept muttering to myself. I was no longer casually strolling along the beach, looking out to sea; I was marching, hunched over, looking at the sand beneath my shoes. I had become self-absorbed; lost in my not-too-pleasant thoughts.

I was brought back to this world when I almost walked into an elderly couple. I apologised profusely. They smiled back and said not to worry; they hadn’t been looking where they were going either.

They were a sweet old couple, with weather beaten but healthy looking faces with open smiles. It was clear that they were very much in love with one another; they each had a hand resting on the other’s waist. I don’t see too many elderly couples who still walk together with their arms about each and so they appeared a little odd.

But what was really strange was that neither of them was wearing any clothes!

I was embarrassed, naturally. But the elderly couple weren’t. They were in no hurry to move on and they began to talk to me. They told me they came often to the island. They asked where I was from and had I been before. They went on to tell me that they had been together 42 years and had 2 children. They also told me many things about themselves and asked many questions about myself. And soon, I forgot about their nakedness and felt at ease, and enjoyed our little conversation.

After a time, the old man said that they must be getting on their way and so we said our goodbyes and continued our separate walks; not once did they make any attempt to explain why they were naked.

As I thought about the old couple I couldn’t help but smile. They were so gentle and at ease with the world. I knew that they were what I wanted to be; free. Totally free from what others may think of them, totally free of any inhibitions to live the life they wanted.

My mind then turned toward the young woman I had seen earlier. I knew, of course, that she was not an exhibitionist seeking attention. She was also free. She was doing what she wanted because it made her content.

In truth, the annoyance I felt when I first saw her was not for her but for me. Annoyed because I was embarrassed, about what others might think, to do what I really wanted in life.

I came to a stop and stared out to the grey Sea. I knew that I must break free, not from the world or people around me, but from me; myself.

Without the thought crossing my mind I began to undress. I can honestly say I felt no shyness that day when I removed my last garment. I felt no different than when I undress to take a shower. I left my clothes behind and walked into the sea. I didn’t stay long, less than a minute, the water was freezing. But the dip had felt like a baptism. I walked back out and picked up my clothes. I did not dress but made my way back down the beach from where I had come from.

A while later I passed the young woman. She was sitting crossed legged with the sword across her lap, looking out to sea. When I stepped across her line of vision she looked at me and smiled.

I smiled back.

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"How to Retire At Whatever Your Age!"
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Adversity as the Best Teacher: Stop wasting time feeling sorry for yourself!

I remember reading some time ago about a study of longevity in humans. There has been a large body of scientific research into the reasons why some people are long-lived but of course while various diets, health regimes, and regional or ethnic differences are often linked to living long it is a very difficult cause and effect relationship to determine because there are so many other variables involved.

However the study I remember didn't spend as much time on health and diet as many others. The researchers spent time observing and interviewing a number of people who are living long lives to determine what common factors these very diverse people shared.

Do you know what the single largest factor they all shared -- the trait that the researchers determined played the largest role in their long lives? It wasn't a specific food or faith or daily activity. It was simply the way these folks dealt with adversity.

The ways that these folks dealt with adversity did vary. Some had great religious faith, others had an unquenchable zest for life, and others had a great determination that they could and would overcome and difficulty.

If you think about it then this does seem to make sense. After all, the longer you live then the more adversity you must overcome. Human life is fraught with adversity -- both physical and emotional -- although each person's experience varies greatly. In order to survive adversity, to overcome loss and difficulty, and to succeed in life a person must have inner resources to draw from.

As Oliver Wendell Holmes says: "If I had a formula for bypassing trouble, I would not pass it round. Trouble creates a capacity to handle it. I don't embrace trouble; that's as bad as treating it as an enemy. But I do say meet it as a friend, for you'll see a lot of it and had better be on speaking terms with it."

Most of us have seen the evidence of this even if we have never formulated a scientific theory about it. We have seen the cancer patient diagnosed and then does not even live out the time doctors predicted.

We have seen the heart patient diagnosed who far outlives expectations -- by months and then years. What makes the difference between these two groups of people? I believe it has to be a will to live, some inner resource, that one group possesses and the other does not.

A few weeks ago my friend Richard's left hand was amputated after being injured in an accident with a log splitter. It was devastating to those who love him and certainly no one would have blamed him for becoming depressed and grieving.

But Richard hasn't chosen that path. Instead he is focused on what he can do, not on what he can't.

And if he discovers something that he can't do one-handed then he puts his considerable problem-solving abilities to work on a solution. He isn't simply reacting to a tragic accident but proactively seeking solutions.

He is not a saint. He complains about the pain and discomfort of the healing process and is sometimes frustrated by the trial-and-error process of his problem-solving, but he is not wasting time feeling sorry for himself.

He knows he has been given many gifts and those gifts include the ability to solve problems and overcome adversity. I can only hope when my time comes to face adversity that I can meet it with as much energy, determination, and confidence.

-------------

"How to Retire At Whatever Your Age!"
"Want to know what your future has in store for you? Want to your own Destiny? Get your FREE insightful Destiny Reports!"
How to save a Relationship! (PROVEN methods, works for all men and women!)
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"What Women Want" - Get insider peek into her mind and heart!
"FREE Book for you! - 101 Amazing Ways to Say I Love You! (Value $47)" (scroll down the site for instructions to get access to contents in the book!)
"How to make anyone fall in love with you!" - Attract your Mr/Mrs Right TODAY!
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!" - No more headaches to finding the perfect gifts for your loved ones, give them something that will MOVE them to tears!
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How to deal with Loneliness
Feeling lonely? Find out what you can do on your lonely weekends! (tons of weird, crazy, fun ideas!!!)

Aikido: The Way of Harmony and Taking Steps in NEW Direction!

"When attack becomes dance, everything is seen as a gift of energy."

That sounds great, doesn't it?

Couldn't we all use a little more energy from time to time? I know I could. Right now, for instance, as I sit with a blanket over my shoulders, sipping lemon tea and hoping that the next coughing spasm is not as ferocious as the last two, I could use a gift of energy.

The tickle that started in my nose and chest a few days ago has blossomed into a full-blown, body-wracking cold, complete with chills and fever.

The martial art Aikido (The Way of Harmony) teaches us to see everything that comes our way as energy to be danced with. By centering and extending our ki (life energy) we connect and blend with the energy of attack, making it a part of us. We redirect it from center, keeping ourselves and our attacker safe from harm.

How this elegant metaphor applies to situations in our personal and professional lives is a continuing source of study and fascination for me.

One of the ways I work at integrating Aiki principles into my life is by sharing the philosophy with others. We often use physical exercises which help our bodies remember how to do things like center, extend, acknowledge and blend. We begin to dance, flow and move with the energy of conflict instead of blocking it.

So I sit, wondering how I can dance with this attack. Even centering doesn't stop the incessant coughing. I have no ki to extend (it seems to have retreated to the innermost recesses of my system). The only thing I can think to do is to acknowledge and embrace.

But that, at least, is a beginning. In years past, I would not acknowledge being sick. When I was sick, I'd often go to work anyway. I plowed through what needed doing with half a spirit and wore myself out.

I probably infected half a dozen others in the process. I was sometimes ill-tempered, depressed and depressing to be around. If I can't acknowledge what's going on, whether it's a cold or a problem at home, I surely can't embrace it. By this I mean make it a part of me, connect with it so that I can begin to look for solutions.

Most of our conflicts, internal or external, would resolve themselves if we would only take this first step - acknowledge them!

But because we see them as negative, we immediately resist by fighting or fleeing. If I can see what comes my way as energy, with no positive or negative charge other than what I give it, I can be more curious about it. As unwanted as it may be, there's definitely more power in dancing with it than in resisting it.

As for my cold, I'm still trying to learn if there's a gift here somewhere. Let's see - I've already read a book I've been putting aside for months, started another, and gotten some much needed rest (in between coughs!). I may not always know what the energy offers, but when I can ask the question "Where’s the gift?" I've taken a step in a new direction.

-------------

"How to Retire At Whatever Your Age!"
"Want to know what your future has in store for you? Want to your own Destiny? Get your FREE insightful Destiny Reports!"
How to save a Relationship! (PROVEN methods, works for all men and women!)
"What Men Want!" - What men want you to know, secrets he will never, ever tell you in your face!
"What Women Want" - Get insider peek into her mind and heart!
"FREE Book for you! - 101 Amazing Ways to Say I Love You! (Value $47)" (scroll down the site for instructions to get access to contents in the book!)
"How to make anyone fall in love with you!" - Attract your Mr/Mrs Right TODAY!
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!" - No more headaches to finding the perfect gifts for your loved ones, give them something that will MOVE them to tears!
"Find out your Biorhythms online!"
"Have a pressing question or doubt? Want some wise advice fast? Ask the I Ching for advice!"
"What's the best decision to make? Get your FREE Rune Readings!"
"Get your FREE Taort Readings! Know what your future has in store for you! Know what is the BEST decision to make!"
"Which lover or friend is the best one for you? Check your love compatibility!"
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!"
How to deal with Loneliness
Feeling lonely? Find out what you can do on your lonely weekends! (tons of weird, crazy, fun ideas!!!)