My stomach ties up in knots at the thought of approaching others! What to do if you are overly shy?

Do you often feel uncomfortable in a social situation? Perhaps you’re overly shy? Or your stomach ties up in knots at the thought of approaching someone even just to say “Hi!”

Well the good news is that there are many techniques which you can use to help you overcome this problem of social shyness or anxiety.

I’m going to share one of my favourites below. But first, three important points that need to be highlighted (so imagine them covered by ink from a bright yellow fluoro highlighter pen)

1. Don’t expect to get the confidence of Tony Robbins in one day. All changes happen in small steps. Make an effort to stretch yourself just a little bit further every day. And celebrate your victories, no matter how small they are. Those small victories will over time grow into a massive change in your confidence.

2. The best way to overcome a fear is to face it and succeed. What I’m presenting today is one way to build the courage to face your fear. What you need to do though is not only use it, but also search out a whole host of other techniques as well. And use them! Different techniques may be more appropriate for different situations. We’ll of course be talking about many of the other techniques in future articles.

3. As always, if your social shyness or anxiety is causing difficulties in your life, please consider talking to a doctor or a counsellor. They will be able to expand on this strategy, and provide you with many more. They really can help.

So, as promised, here’s one of my favourite techniques for helping you feel more confident as you approach other people in a social situation.

You will be tapping into one of the greatest powers you have within you. More powerful than all the fear you may currently feel.

That power is compassion.

In many of us though it lies asleep, a luxury we feel we can’t afford just yet. Maybe something we’ll get around to exploring when we get over our problems and start feeling happy about ourselves. After all, how can we be compassionate towards others when we don’t even feel good about ourselves?

Is that what you think?

Well, I think we’re better served by looking at things from a different perspective. One that sees compassion not only as a tool for helping others, but also for helping ourselves.

So, how do we use compassion in this situation?

SEE THE OTHER PEOPLE AS BEING JUST LIKE YOU!

They are human. Somewhere within them they have fears too. Their fears may not be visible to you on the surface, but they’re there. We are all human.

We all desire human contact!

We all desire friendship!

We all desire to be loved!

So before approaching someone, remind yourself that they too may have difficulties making the first move. They may be waiting for someone to talk to about their problems and their issues.

They may be waiting for someone just like you, who can understand them and their own fears. Someone just like you, with a heart filled with compassion and love. And perhaps in time, if a friendship develops, you can help them with their own fears.

Why does this work? Simply because it takes the focus off you, and places it onto the other person. How can you help them? How can you be their friend in a time of need?

Of course, don’t approach them with these questions directly. It would not be appropriate in most social situations, especially if you don’t know the person yet. Just approach them with this understanding, that they’re just like you.

They too are human. Make conversation. Talk about them, and their interests. Many times this may lead nowhere. Sometimes though, it could develop into one of the best friendships of your life.

They’re just like you. So there’s no need to be afraid. They also want someone to talk to. Help them!

You can let your shyness or anxiety be a source of fear within yourself, or you can let it build your compassion towards others who are also facing their own demons. Choose compassion! In return, you will also be helping yourself overcome your own fears, one conversation at a time.

-------------

"How to Retire At Whatever Your Age!" - An amazing course! Highly recommended!
"Want to know what your future has in store for you? Want to your own Destiny? Get your FREE insightful Destiny Reports!"
How to save a Relationship! (PROVEN methods, works for all men and women!)
"What Men Want!" - What men want you to know, secrets he will never, ever tell you in your face!
"What Women Want" - Get insider peek into her mind and heart!
"FREE Book for you! - 101 Amazing Ways to Say I Love You! (Value $47)" (scroll down the site for instructions to get access to contents in the book!)
"How to make anyone fall in love with you!" - Attract your Mr/Mrs Right TODAY!
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!" - No more headaches to finding the perfect gifts for your loved ones, give them something that will MOVE them to tears!
"Find out your Biorhythms online!"
"Have a pressing question or doubt? Want some wise advice fast? Ask the I Ching for advice!"
"What's the best decision to make? Get your FREE Rune Readings!"
"Get your FREE Taort Readings! Know what your future has in store for you! Know what is the BEST decision to make!"
"Which lover or friend is the best one for you? Check your love compatibility!"
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!"
How to deal with Loneliness
Feeling lonely? Find out what you can do on your lonely weekends! (tons of weird, crazy, fun ideas!!!)

Stepping out of my comfort zone can be scary and lonely!

I really know I’m alive when I’m outside my comfort zone.

The comfort zone is an amazing place of security, comfort, safety, and protection. Stepping out this zone can be scary and lonely, and involves stretching and growing; this is the bit where physical pain comes into it.

When I was little I remember my mother telling me I was suffering from growing pains because my legs ached, or my knees ached, as a matter of fact anything that ached was due to growing pains. Expanding the comfort zone for me is much the same.

The best thing of course is the end result! This will be when mastery has finally been reached and with it increased inner strength and confidence.

This doesn’t just apply to the ‘big stuff’. This applies across the board no matter how big or small.

Below I’ve listed 5 easy things to help with becoming comfortable with the uncomfortable.

Starting with the most important:

1. Start by noticing what you notice. Each time you do something different notice what your reaction to it is and where this reaction manifests within your body.

2. Keep a journal or diary of feelings and reactions as you continue to grow through stepping out of your comfort zone.

Write three pages in your journal or diary each morning about your ever expanding comfort zone. Write for at least one month then reflect on your pages, starting from page one, noticing any patterns, useful or not.

Use a different coloured pen for things that worked for you in becoming more masterful.

Again using a different coloured pen make note of what definitely did not work.

3. Ask yourself the following questions in regards to growing and stretching:

“What needs to happen now to make it less painful for me?”

“What are the benefits for me in mastering this new thing (relationship, job, task etc)?”

“What am I learning from this experience?”

“What am I not learning from this experience?”

4. Turn negative self-talk into positive speak. The more often positive self talk is practised the more comfortable it will become, until it’s fully integrated and natural.

5. Know that it takes time to become comfortable with something new and different. Unfortunately there is no instant fix or ‘cure’ (I would’ve found it by now!). The quicker the mastery levels raise the quicker the return of a comfort zone.

Some suggestions to help deal with the uncomfortable may be to take up a meditation program, Breath Work, some transformational coaching for inner peace, or investigate a flower essence practitioner near you.

The outcome of this effort will be living how you want to live, and knowing that you’ve achieved this through your own efforts.

A great friend of mine once said to me “Become comfortable with the uncomfortable”. During my uncomfortable moments, I remember that phrase. I know that once mastered, I’ll become comfortable once again…well until the next time I decide to learn something new.

-------------

"How to Retire At Whatever Your Age!" - An amazing course! Highly recommended!
"Want to know what your future has in store for you? Want to your own Destiny? Get your FREE insightful Destiny Reports!"
How to save a Relationship! (PROVEN methods, works for all men and women!)
"What Men Want!" - What men want you to know, secrets he will never, ever tell you in your face!
"What Women Want" - Get insider peek into her mind and heart!
"FREE Book for you! - 101 Amazing Ways to Say I Love You! (Value $47)" (scroll down the site for instructions to get access to contents in the book!)
"How to make anyone fall in love with you!" - Attract your Mr/Mrs Right TODAY!
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!" - No more headaches to finding the perfect gifts for your loved ones, give them something that will MOVE them to tears!
"Find out your Biorhythms online!"
"Have a pressing question or doubt? Want some wise advice fast? Ask the I Ching for advice!"
"What's the best decision to make? Get your FREE Rune Readings!"
"Get your FREE Taort Readings! Know what your future has in store for you! Know what is the BEST decision to make!"
"Which lover or friend is the best one for you? Check your love compatibility!"
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!"
How to deal with Loneliness
Feeling lonely? Find out what you can do on your lonely weekends! (tons of weird, crazy, fun ideas!!!)

What to do if you are constantly feeling depressed!

It can be very vexing to loved one’s when you are depressed. On one hand they want nothing but the best for you, but on the other they sometimes get frustrated and wonder why you can’t simply snap out of it.

It can be particularly hard on children of someone with depression as it may affect their outlook on life for many years to come. Having experienced this myself, I can say definitely this the number one reason to fight your depression.

Work - Work life generally suffers when in the throws of depression. It is more difficult to concentrate and not as easy to create and maintain good professional working relationships and partnerships.

Furthermore, it makes being a “Self-starter” more unlikely. Rather than moving forward, maintaining the status-quo becomes more acceptable, even if only unconsciously.

Love – The love life of a person with depression can suffer tremendously. Regardless of How much someone may profess their dedication to another person, if the other person can never see the bright side, it can wear on them.

Life is short, right? Love conquers A WHOLE LOT, but it doesn’t conquer everything. Sometimes we must add internal fortitude to love to truly be invincible. Besides isn’t it better to fight, not just for you, but for this person that you love as well?

Health – University studies have proven that people who are depressed are more likely to get sick, and more likely to die of an illness than those who are content. It is in your benefit, health wise, to fight your depression as well.

A recent New York Times article, citing a University study, indicated that persons who have been diagnosed as depressed have more hospital visits, and a shorter lifespan.

Prosperity – The depressed person sometimes lacks clarity of thought, and may miss golden opportunities to improve their lives if only they had been paying attention. This may be, perhaps, the most important point, since many people believe they would be happier if only this part of their life, or that part of their life, etc was different.

Allowing good things to happen in your life might just give you the jump start needed to end the cycle of depression and self imposed-isolation( even if only figuratively ).

Fighting depression can help your life in many ways. In some ways, the fight in itself is also a reward. You become stronger, do better at work, have better relationships, and can focus on what is really important in life so that you can improve it, for yourself, your family, friends, and loved ones.

-------------

"How to Retire At Whatever Your Age!" - An amazing course! Highly recommended!
"Want to know what your future has in store for you? Want to your own Destiny? Get your FREE insightful Destiny Reports!"
How to save a Relationship! (PROVEN methods, works for all men and women!)
"What Men Want!" - What men want you to know, secrets he will never, ever tell you in your face!
"What Women Want" - Get insider peek into her mind and heart!
"FREE Book for you! - 101 Amazing Ways to Say I Love You! (Value $47)" (scroll down the site for instructions to get access to contents in the book!)
"How to make anyone fall in love with you!" - Attract your Mr/Mrs Right TODAY!
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!" - No more headaches to finding the perfect gifts for your loved ones, give them something that will MOVE them to tears!
"Find out your Biorhythms online!"
"Have a pressing question or doubt? Want some wise advice fast? Ask the I Ching for advice!"
"What's the best decision to make? Get your FREE Rune Readings!"
"Get your FREE Taort Readings! Know what your future has in store for you! Know what is the BEST decision to make!"
"Which lover or friend is the best one for you? Check your love compatibility!"
"Give a gift of inspiration to all your friends, family members and lover!"
How to deal with Loneliness
Feeling lonely? Find out what you can do on your lonely weekends! (tons of weird, crazy, fun ideas!!!)